Thursday,Sept 21,2006

21.9.2006

A strange day of my teen-school life



Today …I had a rough day…. wat happen? Well lots of unexpected stuffs….ok this is d story….first thing in d morning I stepped into d class..there I c my bootyful best fren, Aima…..she's smiling….ok this is cool..then we all went 2 d assembly..guess wat? As usual…. it was so boring….when we went back to class…the first period was HISTORY! as our famous Puan Khatidjah Pit came a lil bit late into d class

I chat wit Aima..but first I gave her d poetry I wrote 4 her yesterday..she read it..she said it was sweet..awh….i was d happiest gal ever dat moment … i am glad dat she feels d same way as I do bout her all this while…ok..then I gave a poetry to nabil cos I wan him 2 know something private n confidential….not long after dat..i asked him wat does he thinks? Oh my Allah…why? oh..why?...why was he sad n disappointed…all I did was tell him d truth ..is dat wrong? was I suppose to hide d truth n lie 2 him?I jus wish he could understand dat I am trully not ready..cos I really don know wat is love….really…why? mayb cos all this while I was jus playin around n care so much bout all my fens n now I realize I know nothing bout love….

its not like I rejected him or watsoeva….it is jus I need sometime cos I don no him very well n I wanna understand him first..he has 2 give me sometime…n by d way evry1 kept on saying he is a playa..so why can't he jus b wit them 4 a while?ok..i am sad about this cos I really thought he would understand..me as a fren…



After dat…Idham came bak to class after seeing Puan Hee,I gave him d apoligisation letter 2 say dat I am really really sorry….for my big mistake dat I did d other day..i really didn't mean to hurt or ashame him..i gave him but he pretended like it was nothing…I felt sad…but I waited in patience..my heart was goin crazy….but when I look bhind…the letter already in Zaim's hand..how can…dat letter was only for him n his close frens n Zaim is jus a fren 4 him…n then it was in Amin's hand…..n then bak to me..n some1 wrote whatever!OH MY ALLAH! oh…Amin wrote it..Oh Amin u r so mean..ish…budak ni mmglah mcm monyet…gurau je…don b mad ok?....but I was curious how come Idham didn't write anything…oh…rupe2nya..he wouldn't read it…I was so sad..i stayed up all nite 2 rite dat letter n I meant nothing 2 him..omg..only Allah knows how hurt I was..how sad I was…without notification…tears came rolling down my chins…I couldn't hide my feelings ..it is jus too painful..i cried for 50 minits n then while recess 4 another 20 mins…omg…I am so sad….when my frens came bak…dey all said Idham had 4given me…but I didn't believe it until I heard it right from his own mouth..oh wat a day…wat such a terrible feelings…



Not long after dat , I had a talk wit shaz1….i wanna no his probs…cos I can't sleep at nite as I care so much bout him…but it is not like I fell in luv wit him or something like dat..it is jus dat I care so much..as he said there's nothing dat I could do…I asked him…how could I get him out of my mind…..he asked me to rtelax..i tried it b4 ok? it wouldn't work out…I really want him n bad get 2gether as frens again…I asked him 2 say hi 2 bad..he said he won't cos bad did not say hi to him….so I went to bad n ask him 2 say hi to shaz…but…wat came out of his mouth gives me pain in d ass..he said whose at fault now..why should he say hi when shaz is to blame..i mean it is not like I am busy body but I care bout my frens ..dey r like my fam members…so how can family members fight like this man? wat happened to d clean n honest frenship after all this while?dat really killed my soul n wit go wei's words…I am weak…why ppl r so mean 2 me..i love them n dey treat me like I am nothing…to them…I feel so rejected n small (not to aima n ain n nabil )…man..i cried again..ouch..my brain freezed…wat was worse is dat I am fasting..oh why?????



I was hurt much enough 2day….n at d last period something bad came out..shaz, ain,mar,bad…man somethin's goin on….i ask shaz…he said he'll say hi right now..he said on d way but when..i can't wait 2 c u guys make peace…..but no..man bad's face change..he is mad…evry1 can tell dat…ain asked ..i asked…bad said why as frens we shoulkd hide things from each other…? I gues he is right..but some things r jus 2 confidential….omg..when I was about to settle things out or at least try..d rang bell n we all rushed out of class…I won der wat had happened..all I know I am sure not goin 2 sleep well 2night…cos of three of my best pals who I really love n care(sayang)….n dey r nabil , shaz n bad



This is really a strange day for me in school…everything was sad..luckily Aima was there 4 me……why must we fight wit each other..why r there misunderstamnding..we r supposse 2 b a fam n generate peace…guys…when will u ever understand?